Photo by Susie Baer, Sunrise in Dewey Beach
Monday, December 23, we will meet online.
Dear friends,
This week, we will meet Monday evening, December 23th, from 7-8:30PM EST online; Wednesday morning, Dec 25th, from 7-8AM EST in person at our meditation space (3812 Northampton Street NW); and Friday, Dec 27th, 12-1PM EST online.
On Monday night Susie will facilitate. Susie shares:
When a friend asks for help in a challenging situation or complains about something in their life, I listen deeply and ask if they want my input. If they do, I will likely respond with a suggestion, which sometimes my friend resists because they only want to repeat their story. They may be unaware that they are repeating the same story and the acting out of the same habit energies. They may have a blindspot.
I think about my own blindspots: What am I resistant to? What suggestion has a friend offered that I couldn’t receive because I wasn’t ready, and I just wanted to repeat the story I have told for decades?
Blindspots are the places where we don’t see ourselves, others, or the world. When we practice mindfulness with compassion, we can illuminate and transform these hidden areas.
Thich Nhat Hanh (Thay) described habit energies as ingrained patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting that operate beneath our conscious awareness. They dictate our reactions to situations, leading to automatic responses that don't serve us or others well.
For example, we may have blindspots when we react with anger instead of understanding or consistently seek distractions instead of addressing our discomfort. Mindfulness shines a light on our habit energies, allowing us to observe them without judgment and gradually transform them.
One of our most hidden habits is how we perceive ourselves. We often cling to fixed ideas of who we are—our identity, strengths, and flaws. This creates suffering when we resist change or fail to recognize our interconnection with others.
In relationships, our blindspots can cause misunderstandings and suffering. We might project our own insecurities, expectations, or judgments onto others without realizing it and not recognize their suffering. In order to transform, we can try to practice deep listening to understand the other person's perspective, cultivate awareness of our own emotions and triggers, or pause before speaking to notice if our words come from a place of reactivity or understanding.
Another blindspot might be a tendency to avoid uncomfortable emotions like fear, sadness, or anger. Thay often taught that suppressing these emotions only strengthens their hold over us. Instead, he encouraged us to gently acknowledge and embrace them with mindfulness:
Breathing in, I know this fear is here.
Breathing out, I embrace this fear with compassion.
Practicing this way allows us to see our emotions and habit energies more clearly and with time we can transform them.