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Dear friends, Marie will lead our sangha on Monday September 19. She shares:
Dear Thay, dear sangha,
Today, I had blocked time to write this missive, having chosen a different topic that resonated deeply; I was excited to share it with the sangha and learn from you. And then, around 5am, came a migraine. As background, I’ve had chronic migraines for thirty years and have tried numerous ways to preempt and treat them, including a new approach that I started last week. I really did NOT want this migraine, but there it was.
So what did I do? Well, first I tried to deny it and hoped that the new approach was working - despite all appearances to the contrary. When the pain amped up, I yielded and took some medicine, which took the edge off, but not much. Then, I tried several different remedies, from walking meditation to diet coke (talk about contrasts), and none of them worked.
Finally, I surrendered. I went back to bed, put a cold face cloth on my forehead and tried something different.
I accepted the migraine was there and, at the same time, recited to myself: “This body is not me; I am not this body.” When my mind started wandering, clenching onto the pain or worrying that it would always be this way, I came back to my breath and this mantra. After a while, I felt some ease. The migraine was still there, but I was different: I was not my migraine.
It's now a few hours later, and reflecting on this experience, I can see that, in addition to having a migraine, I was picking up and hefting a lot of baggage: disappointment that the new treatment did not work, fears about future migraines, getting further behind on work… the list went on.
When I stopped - really stopped (as opposed to “fake stopped”) - and practiced - things shifted in ways that brought relief. While the migraine was still there, it didn’t matter as much because I was more than my migraine. So, this became my topic for Monday: how do you practice with physical pain?
In his article “How to be a Pine Tree”, our dear teacher Thay describes how we can do this:
“The Buddha proposed so many ways to practice to reduce the pain in your body and in your emotions, and to reconcile with yourself… You can reduce physical pain through the practice of releasing tension in the body. Pain increases as a function of tension, and it can be reduced if we release the tension… Put things down, don’t carry anything, and feel light. There is a burden we always carry with us. The skill we need is how to lay down our burden in order to be light. If you sit, walk, or lie down like that, it’s very easy to release the tension and reduce the pain.
The Buddha said that you shouldn’t amplify your pain by exaggerating the situation. He used the image of someone who has just been hit by an arrow. A few minutes later, a second arrow strikes him in exactly the same spot. When the second arrow hits, the pain is not just doubled; it is many times more painful and intense…
If you recognize the pain as it is and don’t exaggerate it, then you can make peace with it, and you won’t suffer as much. But if you get angry and revolt against it, if you worry too much and imagine that you’re going to die very quickly, then the pain will be multiplied one hundred times. That is the second arrow, the extra suffering that comes from exaggeration. You should not allow it to arise. This is very important. It was recommended by the Buddha: Don’t exaggerate and amplify the pain.”
I invite you to share your experiences of being in pain, being with pain or other aspects of your practice. If you wish, you may consider these questions:
When you experience pain, what does your mind do?
What burdens do you carry alongside your pain? To what extent are you aware of them?
Are there practices that have helped you to make peace with pain?
I look forward to being together and learning how we can ”lighten our baggage”.
Warmly,
Marie