A few weeks ago, when a member of our community asked that we explore the topic of grief, I felt grateful. Until recently, my experience with grief tended to be direct, tsunami-like events that flattened me. Then, with practice and time, came healing. Dry land on which I could find my feet. Gratitude for the presence of that person - which continued long after they had died.

With all that is happening in this world and in this country, I’m feeling grief more frequently, but the nature of that grief is different. As a privileged person, cocooned on a beautiful farm with work that connects me with nature, these crises have affected me indirectly - largely through the suffering of others. I recently learned the term “second hand trauma” that describes this, in part. Rather than a single tsunami, this can feel like an unrelenting set of waves, towering and fathomless, pounding other people, who have no chance to find dry land.

This week Annie will facilitate. We will read the Five Mindfulness Trainings from Thich Nhat Hanh, and we will focus on the 3rd training.

The third mindfulness training is about sexual misconduct (see below). This training often gets glossed over because many of us mindfulness and Buddhist practitioners feel that we are not likely to commit any kind of sexual misconduct, so we don't need to practice this training as seriously as the others.

I used to feel that way, but today I have a different view.

Even if we ourselves have never participated in acts of sexual assault, we may be unconsciously participating in a culture of rape and mysogeny which pervades much of the U.S. and other cultures. And the only way to be part of healing is to speak openly about what we see and experience.

How do we respond when we hear jokes about women being subjugated or raped? Do we laugh at or sing along with lyrics implying that women need to be controlled or raped? Do we stand up to attacks on women in the comment section of their writing? Do we wonder silently what a woman did to get herself in a position to be raped ("We would never do that."). More examples of our rape culture here.

The concept of no-self is something I find simultaneously both one of the most interesting and complex concepts in Buddhism. This idea sits right at the center of the practice and forms of the three marks of existence, namely impermanence, suffering and non-self (Sanskrit: Anatta).

I read this passage some time ago and found it to at least provide some entry point for my own understanding:

“From the point of view of time, we say “impermanence”, and from the point of view of space, we say “non-self”. Things cannot remain themselves for two consecutive moments, therefore there is nothing that can be called permanent “self”. Before you entered this room, you were different physically and mentally. Looking deeply at impermanence, you see non-self. Looking deeply at non-self, you see impermanence. We cannot say, “I can accept impermanence, but non-self is too difficult. They are the same.”

Essential to the understanding of non-self is our awareness that self is made up entirely of non-self elements and that there is no separation between self and non-self and everything is interconnected…

It has been said that the mark of a true Plum Village practice is that it is a “Coming Home” practice. Last week marked the Summer Solstice and the longest day of the year. The summer is a yang time, or time of outward energy. Yang is translated as “the sunny side of the hill”, while yin is translated as “the shady side of the hill”.

Our yang may have been lit to a hotter fire by recent events. The quarantine of the

Spring built up to the explosion of the summer.

Amidst the great grief and suffering of this time what does it feel like to hear the

Words, Present Moment, Wonderful Moment. How can we say Present Moment, Wonderful Moment in such a time of unrest, grief and loss? When we meditate on this phrase we say, breathing in I dwell deeply in the present moment, breathing out I am aware that it is a wonderful moment. Perhaps present moment, wonderful moment does not quite fit for you at this time.

The 3rd Mindfulness Training in this new and revised offering is called "Cherishment as True Love". As I understand this training I think of it as encouraging us to love and care for ourselves and others more deeply and to seek justice and peace by doing no harm, having no hate, and working for liberation and freedom for all. This can be the path of practicing true love.

For me this is the heart of our mindfulness practice. I see so much suffering in the world, why wouldn't I want to nurture seeds of joy, love, and compassion in myself and in others and help myself and others suffer less. It sounds so simple, yet in practice we can often be so overwhelmed by seeing the violence, discrimination and hate in our world that we fall short of seeing how we are part of it, and then we retreat and wish and hope for it all to just go away.

I have participated in many events in the past couple weeks, including marching in protests, writing letters, making masks, participating in food pantry for homeless people, and just when I begin to feel hopeful, like we are working toward a common goal, I read the newspaper and hear of another horrific crime, and then another, and another, against a human being - another black bodied person. I become exhausted, and sometimes feel frozen. That is when I go back into that overwhelm with feelings of despair and deep sadness and then I retreat. I am not watering the seeds of love and compassion for myself and certainly cannot find the energy to help others.

This Monday I thought I would return once more to the subject of equanimity. I was reading the other morning about the last few weeks in the world's stockmarkets. They were explaining the reasons for the extreme levels of volatility which have seldom been seen (in the last few decades) other than at the very worst of the 2008 crash and on 9/11. The commentator laid out their thesis as to why this time was different and that we should prepare for what they described as an “extreme zig- zag world” of highs and lows lasting possibly the next decade and beyond.

We all knew that we likely had a bumpy ahead with issues such as wealth inequality, climate change, societal polarization and systemic racism needing to be tackled — even putting aside the current pandemic. It’s no wonder the volcano just blew its top…

Dear Friends,

During times like these, I am so grateful for our community where we can come and sit together in silence and also share from our hearts.

As I write this, protests in Washington DC are growing in size every day and similar actions are happening in all 50 states. I know that many of us have been out there in solidarity with the calls for justice, demilitarizing the police, and racial equality. I am guessing this is on the hearts and minds of most of us right now.

My own practice with engaged Buddhist practice (read a talk by Thich Nhat Hanh (Thay) on Engaged Buddhism HERE) grows out of the Fourteen Mindfulness Trainings which I received from Thay in 2009. In the ninth and tenth trainings, we are recommended to do the following…

With all that is happening in our world, in our country, and in our cities at this time, I pondered what might possibly be of assistance today. I realized that I wanted you to know that All of you who are reading this message are part of our practice community, our sangha. Please know that we hold you tenderly in our hearts when we sit and walk together --- and that includes many of you who have not yet had the opportunity to sit and walk with us in person or virtually. When we dedicate any benefits of our shared practice together, know that it includes you:

• May you and all beings everywhere have happiness and the root causes of happiness

• May you and all beings everywhere be liberated from suffering and the root causes of suffering

• May you and all beings everywhere never be separated from the joy which is free from sorrow

• May you and all beings everywhere rest in equanimity, free from attachment and anger.

As I sat down and prepared to write, I was moved by an online offering on May 30, 2020 in Tricycle:

“In his earliest teachings, the Buddha said that the heart possesses four divine qualities: lovingkindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, and equanimity. He spoke of these qualities as the most direct and effective way of relating to ourselves and others, and also as the very substance of who we are…

So when I started thinking several weeks ago about what I would share for sangha this week, the first thing that came to mind was the idea of hopefulness. Particularly during this challenging and difficult time - I felt like what we all needed was hope. Hope that we would be safe, healthy, find peace and be able to carry on and return to some kind of normalcy. I looked up the definition of hope in the dictionary - it says "a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen". This was not exactly what I expected it to say - so I looked a little further for a more spiritual meaning and found "A wish or trust that something good will happen". So the second expression is what I wanted to focus on.

I didn't exactly come to this idea of hope with a lot of confidence. I initially found the days dragging with feelings of sadness, despair, fogginess as I read and listened to the news, worried about my 90 year old parents, my brother in a service related field, my daughter with asthma, and then all the poor, marginalized and homeless people who have been hit the hardest with this pandemic.

Dear Friends,

This week Annie will facilitate, and we will recite the Five Mindfulness Trainings. We will focus our discussion on the Second Mindfulness Training, True Happiness.

True Happiness

Aware of the suffering caused by exploitation, social injustice, stealing, and oppression, I am committed to practicing generosity in my thinking, speaking, and acting. I am determined not to steal and not to possess anything that should belong to others; and I will share my time, energy, and material resources with those who are in need.

I will practice looking deeply to see that the happiness and suffering of others are not separate from my own happiness and suffering; that true happiness is not possible without understanding and compassion; and that running after wealth, fame, power and sensual pleasures can bring much suffering and despair.

I am aware that happiness depends on my mental attitude and not on external conditions, and that I can live happily in the present moment simply by remembering that I already have more than enough conditions to be happy. I am committed to practicing Right Livelihood so that I can help reduce the suffering of living beings on Earth and reverse the process of global warming.

Dear Friends,

This week we are honored to be joined by one or more of the monastics from Plum Village and Deer Park Monasteries. Brother Chân Pháp Lai (his name translates to Coming of the Dharma) will lead us in our dharma topic.

We will enjoy our usual guided meditation and walking meditation periods (led by Annie), after which Brother Chân Pháp Lai will share whatever teachings he feels inspired to share with us.

We hope you will be able to join us for this talk! Click to read more…

Dear Friends,

The teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh that speak most to my heart are those that remind me of an experience I had with one of my students.

This student was incarcerated between the ages of 14 and 17 years old, and I corresponded with him throughout his sentence.

The decision to continue our teacher-student relationship was not easy for me since that school year I was serving a dual administrator/teacher role and was due to a big promotion. My principal was not happy when I opted to testify in court when I was subpoenaed and was furious when she found out that I was corresponding with my student without letting her know.

This was my chance to decide to either treat this young man as ”someone else’s child” or as if he could have been my own. The teacher in me saw his redeeming qualities, his capacity for Buddhahood. This experience and my continued relationship with this young man for the last 12 years have deeply influenced my dedication to restorative justice and advocacy for youth.

Dear friends,

Tonight we will follow on the theme that Susie so beautifully offered last week. We will continue to use our breath to bring us calm, to bring us stability. Breath is the link that brings our body and mind together. By calming the mind, we calm the body and by calming the body, we calm the mind. As Thay often reminds us, breathing is our anchor. I’m reminded that breathing is an object of meditation that I can use on and off the cushion. It only takes me a minute to stop and do one or two slow, deep breaths. So simple, yet so calming, grounding. Too beneficial to only use on the cushion!

We will start the evening with a guided meditation from Plum Village that uses our breath as a support to deepen our connection to Mother Earth. I enjoyed it very much and hope you will too!

Our 20 year old daughter who’s studying in London was the first In our family to shelter in place. Her concern for us, as well as the lessons learned in Europe, led my ‘cluster’ here in DC to begin staying home earlier than locally mandated. I am grateful that we are all working hard to follow the guidance to stay home and to stay safe as being the best practices to protect ourselves, our families and our larger community. At the same time, I am deeply aware of those working in essential services who are helping others, at risk to themselves. Deep gratitude.

Everyday I am a different person. Each experience and thought is a learning moment for me to grow and change and be challenged to evolve in this body and mind experience.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve listened to the news each morning. And one day I didn’t. And I was happy. I realized all that I am grateful for. I returned to my practice of breathing, and noticed the positive outcomes of breathing — calm & centered. Whether in the midst of a pandemic or in my normal life, I always have the choice to enjoy my breath.

I read a quote by Thich Nhat Hanh, and it reminded me of something that happened when I was in my 20’s.

Thay said, “When the crowded Vietnamese refugee boats met with storms or pirates, if everyone panicked all would be lost. But if even one person on the boat remained calm and centered, it was enough. It showed the way for everyone to survive.”

We are all suffering right now, and none of us know how the future will unfold.

As a mammal in a time of great uncertainty, swimming in a 24/7 news cycle, I am tempted to focus on my worries and fears. There’s a part of me that’s convinced that, if I can just read enough articles from enough legitimate sources, I’ll be better prepared, better able to take care of my family, friends and those in need. For a few days, I identified with that part and became addicted to the news before realizing, thankfully, that this was a form of “unmindful consumption” and made things worse: I felt more isolated and drawn toward a “fortress mentality” that ran counter to my core.

This Monday night we are making some changes to the format of our ‘typical’ Sangha in acknowledgment of concerns surrounding group gatherings and the Coronavirus. Rather than just taking a brief hiatus we have decided to take our Sangha online and to convene via video conference using Zoom (Instructions as to how to join are available below but you can do this either via computer or phone). The format for the evening will be the same as usual and comprise a guided relaxation meditation, followed by mindful movements (rather than the usual walking meditation), followed by a second shorter sitting meditation. We will then have 45 minutes for dharma sharing.

There is no registration required, just click here for the details on how to join us online.

The topic for this week's sharing was scheduled to be one the Five Mindfulness Trainings, but we have decided to push this back later into the month. Rather we thought it timely to revisit the issue of uncertainty and calming the fearful mind. This particular topic is one which has been explored over the millennia by buddhist practitioners and has been widely written about by Thay. Infact Thay wrote a book specifically on this issue to address the post 9/11 realities and as a response to fear of terrorism. One of Thay’s best known quotes on the subject is:

“The only way to ease our fear and be truly happy is to acknowledge our fear and look deeply at its source. Instead of trying to escape from our fear, we can invite it up to our awareness and look at it clearly and deeply.”

Thích Nhất Hạnh, Fear: Essential Wisdom for Getting Through the Storm